Flayed Music Box

Oh little showgirl what do you need?
Pried upon by eyes of greed,
Strung up so pretty in veils of red,
Lying beneath are chains and dread,
You cannot be tamed,
Rest is for the dead,
Close the box and go to bed.

Spinning Outside for all to hear,
The box is solitude, 
The box is fear,
During rotation you can perceive,
The effects of your captivity,
The hand that turns it thinks you'll flee
The mirror is truth and but the scars you can't see,
They turn the handle but you hold the key.

The unlawful tune is so psychotic,
This stage men built seems quite symbolic,
Your movements they rust and seem robotic,
I see your tears and they are hypnotic.
We'll pay you cash,
Just for a flash,
Your sorrow is like a narcotic.

Oh little show girl why do you spin?
In this dreadful world of sin,
Is there hope that you can win?
The song you wrote is yours to sing,
So sing it loud,
But don't be too proud,
The man you serve is not your king.

Oh little show girl hung up and flayed,
With skin so soft the red will fade,
If you are an item then how will you trade?
You've run out of flesh of which you've displayed,
They'll have their profit,
And you'll have your grave.


side-note : Ta Eve for some inspiration (bittersweet).

Show Tune Short

I wish I could be simultaneously,
Alone but together,
No judgment; just me.
An infinite summer,
Spent sat by that tree,
All of these things but most of all free.
I’ve always been whole but still I’ve felt half,
Perspective is something that adds to the craft,
To display my feelings not provoking a laugh,
An art yet to master,

The vision seems daft.

Questions

Who are you? what are you doing here?
You have a love? You have a life? embrace the fear
You have a dream? are you still young? i guess its near
Realistic? Or fictional? will father cheer?

What are you doing? What are you hiding?
Is this a gift? a piece you wrote? that's quite exciting
A secret door? or something more? Its just some writing
Emotional? or Biblical? Religious slighting

Is that a sin? Its pretty vague or not explained
Come from within? learned on the side? you are abstained
A family? The friends you see? it seems maintained
Envious? or strenuous? you seem strained

Is that a moral? young you would have a lot to say
reciprocation? Annihilation? feelings conveyed
Aged well? like alcohol? peer pressure swayed
Innocent? or common sense? you have in spades

Burn the Box

An emotional arsonist, Burn the box while still inside of it

Fire for a show, the spectacle will grow in the dim lit cavern inside of him
Watch the essence whip the air and struggle like the man trapped inside
Let the walls consume you, embroiled with the flames
Tender embers burn for hours charring feelings into ash
In this little pocket where no sun can compare, the passion burned white hot 
Close to the center for a second it was beautiful
Ended on the outskirts of a spark most unusual 
Then the winds will scatter and scream whistling for the phoenix 

Short & Sweet

There was an old wife’s tale I did not think true,
Once you stop looking the treasure finds you,
The siren had sung and I got the view,
Of dimples and smiles so incredibly cute,
Written for you in a mindset that’s new,
Once I was blank and undoubtedly blue,
Now I met you there’s a spring in my shoe,
And there’s a new interest I’d like to pursue,
It ends with the day and started with you.

(A Poem for Olivia's birthday) 

where i'm @ 2

Straight from the dome, one take as un-incriminating as i can be, here is me.
Firstly shout out to music in general for being 1 of 3 anchors too sanity
Special shout outs Darwin Deez, Kendrick Lamar, Lucy Rose, LL Cool J and Tyler the creator

Now to buzznuzz
Firstly i'm at the bottom of this huge emotional well with a blonde rope as my only support (yeah i'm all about imagery and metaphors)
I'm basically a potato until uni starts and i can get my life back on track, home life is just so repetitive. Being at home is like a cheap imitation of freedom, i'm still bound by the constraints/blessings that are my family. The thought of being in third year/ the anxiousness of the awesomeness that MIGHT be third year have kept me up till around 3am every night since i passed second year 3 months ago. I prepared to fail and failed at failing.

Detachment from friends due to isolation and funding is pretty sweet if you're into loosing all your friends and being poor. On top of that my carelessness may just land me a repeat of last year, but the worst part is i feel like a blank slate, all this shit is just happening while i sit helplessly; I've never been more grey. I feel trapped. by my own psyche, my home, my everything is closing in and i'm uncool with being cool about this.

My emo fruit detox is going well, although i did have a slip up when i was at a party, i always forget why i don't drink until its too late,

I feel like i should break things, I've wanted to break my PC for days now and its not even acting up. I've got this silent rage right now and oh fuck am i a volcano i can feel it coming. Don't worry I'm not a serial killer (But that's what a serial killer would say) I've got a good hold on it but i want to break me? i'm the only thing that can realistically recover from a thrashing if you think about it(TY evolution) non lethal damage ofc. I'M A MAN OF LOGIC GOD DAMN IT.

I have plans to go to a field and yell a bunch of times tomorrow, listen to some music maybe run about a bit. i also feel like i'm describing myself like a free range hen who gained sentience. Oh brain <3

Besides that i'm a big fan of the whole "Netflix and chill" thing that going on its ironically hilarious
Sleep can suck a dick
I've learnt how to make the most amazing wedges in my solidarity
I'm stoked to get a job at uni
I'm kinda stoked to maybe pass this year
I'm stoked to get my confidence back, i'm a siphon
I'm looking forward to Star Wars
I am a sheep and all hail our lord and savior Jesus Krust

Peace

Slam 2

Flash of inspiration,
Stash of sensations,
Things I felt now and then,
And in the end it wont be pretend,
Losing all of my help I think I’m starting to melt; it’s hell.

What was once cold, cool, calm and collected,
Is now just wet, spilled out and subjected,
To dreams all connected,
I froze stiff and tall,
My rays all reflected,
melted down to a haze,
It only took a few days.
New fuel for a blaze.

I have spoken with the moon,
I ask “please sing me for me soon”,
you’re making me loom
I gravitate to this perfect doom.
I feel myself slipping from the inside,
The further away I drift from my minds eye,
The closer I get to the fatal line
I just wanna die; I just wanna fly.