Looking down at a box

Prepped my chest for evils,

Each decorated faithfully,

I figured all sides equal,
As i lived with eccentricity,

But was forced to face the sequel,

My admiration was mimicry,

Demons settled on my right,

On the left, it has a vacancy.

This decent is plagiarism,
The first death was the slowest, 

Prepared in days of fatalism,

For the date I reach my lowest,
Preordered my coffin,

To own the vessel of poet,

I'll be the last inside,
And the first one to close it.

Killing Time

Tried to master the AMs,
We slip into PMs,
And without warning,
We quilted over coffins,

And we tried to call it mourning.

Dr Boondocks

Physicians paid and made to feign a friend,

Not even the trained confirming where it stemmed,

Fools with tools turning inner demons to men,

Always a chance to lose your mind at the end.

A monochrome mind and its forgotten hues,

Now manufactured on mass and deemed safe to use,

We chase after the synthesis of the two,

Pumping our hearts through with shades of blue.

Embody purposeless flesh to disrupt,

Burning with passion or iodine in the cuts?

Iodine tinted eyes left them burnt and corrupt,

Butterflies cannibalize right through the guts.

Subtle salves smother these sparse shallow wounds,

All ailments and cures reflect the reviews,

Now you're higher and wired on all you consume,

Prescriptions are laced decorating our tombs.

Mammalian parasites

Two legs could be four if lowered enough,

The weight of the world on a civilized savage, 

Roused to accept it was predatory,

Forced its four legs to two,

Foul beasts raised to men,

Which dress the fiends as cattle,

Feigning desires for comradery,

They cohort with vermin while leaving them hungry.

The city rat hates the country mouse,

Ignorant to the machinations of the other,

The dirt road becoming stone,

Connected in their merged path,

The stones rolling back to dirt,

Amicable symmetry in their shared stalkers,

Both remain prey to a known power,

Blind under eyelids as they feast in their sleep.

Pray to the stars as the worms praise their earth,

Drawn to everything made under the sun,

Howling cultured nothings beneath the moon,

Each practicing its own sane heresy,

Some glide on artificial wings,

The limbless others forced to trudge the dirt,

Brought down into the natural soil,

Places even the king of the jungle can be humbled.

Bloodied the tips of the hand that fed you,

Destined to feast on this barren maternity,

Guided past the boundaries of a mothers cycle,

Gathered around her warped and molded roots,

Grounded by ironclad mistresses of metal,

Guilty of a need known by anything truly natural,

At every day's end, there always remains,

The feral need for that same tender gooseflesh.

Check the waves

Surface breached,
Witness the days first light,
Hues of grey of blue and white,
In the warmth creating shade,
Check the waves, check the waves.

Shoreline battered,
Taste the saline ridden skies,
Waste the sight with covered eyes,
Salt on skin as it decays,
Check the waves, check the waves.

Seascape horizon, 
Reflecting beauty in the night,

Found foreign bodies without spite,

An overwhelming pressure to brave,
Check the waves, check the waves.

Sinking bellows,

Sirens song drawn to the tide,

In the depths of the deprived,

Under rocks lie things we can save,

Check the waves, check the waves.

(I miss Swansea)

Really What Was I To Do? I Couldn't Help But Lock Eyes With You

As I carry these coals of the past,
Made from burnt up treasures,
I was promised they would last,
Hauled darkness to my chosen destination,

The fact that i would leave,

None could believe I'd be so brazen.

Weighted eyes only witness what was wasted,

These eyes are telling lies,
What i carry I cremated,

A heavy head rearward and attached to a zealot,  

Intentions are masked,

I've Turned a thief to a felon.

The importance was never in the relation,

It's these petty thoughts that start those same sensations,

Set for a simulations,

Long nights,

Sombre sights,
Locked in these lives I've created,
Coveting jewels on a ring that isn't made yet.

Its reflected in the streets,
I've seen it in the seats of a bus or a train,

Refracted through the sheets of a bed,

Redirected through the holes in my head,

Carrying lenses of flesh,

Concocted skin to caress,

Created this mess to contain,

Fabricated and finalized in the brain,

Including the pain,

Inclusive with shame.

Praying that these pipe-dreams just end themselves.

Scrambled Eggs

London was always engulfing,
The sounds and smells of the city,
Different people or colors,
A sensory storm manifested
Into dynamic vibrant clockwork.

Overwhelming for a child
On the back of a motorbike
Holding the back of a father,
And the gum i wasn't allowed,
His, the only sweetness i knew,
A minty stick of forgiveness.

Tender lashes meant for love,
Cupped eyes that only saw grey,
Another bound toy in the cupboard,
A funeral inside my human heart,
Each touch always an uncertain bet,
The stake made permits a freedom,
Gambling on the next sensation.

Fatherly hand of unbridled justice,
The sweet and cycled sentencing,
An education for all if needed,
Anything can be a lesson taught,
In discipline and ones equity
A previous anarchy for vengeance
Jealousy and spite in children,
Which grew on me as forms of love.

When spoken from resentless lips
I've paused to consider if i should feel
Anything but an ignorant acceptance,
I've pondered on the size of the bottle
Which i'd cram to overflowing
With a sense of development
fixating indifference to traumas,
Some of which i still wear,
The belts and boots complete me.

Back to the World - Vivid dream/Poem #3

The gravity of the situation is truly grounding,
In the end mannequins will remain in the void,
Breathless and bond to nothing,
Looking into the void at lights that dim and spiral,
One by one they took the stars which were yours to give,
Black behemoths who'd violently rip from the balance,
A gift spent by a green goddess,

Back pressed to the sun i couldn't help but think of halos,

Humbled by the light above and the ground engulfing below,

I had forgotten where your vengeful eyes fell,

The constant pull of a turning body,

A golden horizon to dry and stun the eyes,
Drawing sense from the rubble seems unlikely,
My senses dulled by the elements,
The hot intensity of an Erie silence,

The void in which i'm born becomes the tomb of my unrest,
Cleansed down to stardust,

Riding rings through rings forever outward.
_______________________________________________________________________

As written in the dream journal:

So i was giant, strapped to the earth like a torture rack thing,

gravity was all weird since i was half on half off the planet, so my front felt super light while my back was essential glued to the planet.

Remember the green giant from the corn add's? Well that was an ex of mine who was bigger than sun.

She was handed multiple celestial bodies (from what i assume is galaxy stage hands cause they were in black morph suits) to smash onto me.

I remember being waterboarded by one then she spun the earth around like a park toy, another was sand which got in my mouth i think then, the obvious one i got burned up by the sun and exploded.


This is my 8th cheesecake dream in a row.

Nang Bangs

Wake up,
I don't want to be here,
The last few years set ablaze by some sightseers,
Its my life, so i kept it in low gear,
Inner workings, mechanisms turning with the slow gears,
Like clockwork, get jitters when her hands near,
Looking for quick and easy ways i can take over this damned sphere,
It wont work,
Guess that time is trouble,
Think how long I've been stuck in this bubble.

Look in the mirror,
I'm a meta human,
Maddened at the masses of these monochrome re runs,
Same task different day, is the pain fun?
Monotony's common feed for these times that i'm undone,
Face sweating, got to win this game man,
Had a hard time so i guess ill make it rain man,
Shot myself in the foot so i cannot complain,
And i did it so that i could feel your pain.

Archived, when i look back on my ordered blows,
Pages of data combine and rhyme as my mind grows,
Got a clips full of wit, the guns my ego,
Hindsight a bitch,
I'd never question question what she knows,
One shot, I gotta take you from the top,
Elite status will vanish, still reeling from the drop,
When you're on the bottom no ones telling you to stop,
His social life began then it ended with the laptop.

5 years spent trapped in my own brain,
when someone gave consciousness to this kid it was a damn shame,
Thinking of moments never stops, like this damn rain,
Characters act cinematic, like its a damn game,
Spent a decade in the dirt tending spines,
10 years from now, a hell of a design,
One day, i guess i'll grow up,
But until then i will cash out on my luck.

Mental Dancin

Cold winter never wake up, 

Warm summer until we break up, 

We wont worry about the clean up, 

Don't think that i can keep up, 

Dance with me i can keep up. 

Cracking my head just to get a clue, 

Snapping my neck to get a clear view, 

No voice left but i can hear you, 

Definitely look better from the rear view, 

Spinning my mind through the same night, 

Twist the design until it aint right, 

We might have had a connection, 

But i never have your attention. 

Skipped steps fast, 

Sped through A to Z, 

Most thoughts came last, 

Gaps in the intimacy, 

The past is ash, 

Forge a future with me, 

What have i got to prove, 

Versus what you believe, 

At ease, 

In this entrancing grove, 

Best believe i want to dance with you.

A little diggin

I dug deep in the cold to recover my mind,
Amidst the ceaseless snow of my personal fjord,
Each stroke an arrogant celebration of the self,
All because i hid my heart int he dirt,
Inclined to converse with the worms,
Mounds become peaks in this dreamscape,
Something to look up at as i work with gravity,
From my shoulders i watch as i scratch and scrape,
With time to ponder every flake,
Tools Swiss red and preserved in ice,
Winds that shape and carve,
The violent hum nostalgic,
In this hole i am alone,
But this hole i've made my home.

Warm Winter

Any other timeless day,
A Natural encounter,
Cold problems and seasons,
Unnaturally calculated,
In the arms of anything but despair,
Looking down at the flora on my chest,
Unphased by the risen blues and grays,
A shared aesthetic of an instinctive architect,
Given time to admire the primal geometry,
Body glazed over by a repeated chill,
Frozen and weighted in warmth,
Question suppressing the shivers,
Circled by the cuticle vine,
Flattered and nourished by the paradox,
Dry ice structures which melt on cue,
Against your smoldering maw.